I will tell you a story about overcoming challenges that happened this week. I have sung in a concert, and I’ve not done that before. It’s been quite a big deal for me. I’ll explain how joining a choir and putting myself massively out of my comfort zone has worked out well in the end… Spoiler alert…It went really well and I enjoyed it…

I don’t come from a musical background and didn’t have opportunities to engage musically as a child. That wasn’t really offered to me, although both my parents play the piano and are musical; they played instruments, and my mum even studied music at college; I didn’t get the chance to do that myself. I ensured that my son had that option, and he has had the musical childhood I didn’t have. He can play various instruments and sang as a Chorister, so I was part of that kind of musical upbringing with him as a parent. Still, I didn’t get to do that myself as a child.

The older I got, the more I would go to one of the musical events at my son’s school. I loved it; it was amazing. I would think I’d love to be part of this, but because I’d never done it before. I couldn’t just watch them and say, “Oh, I sing in the x section,” I didn’t even know the words to use or know what I could sing or couldn’t sing, I did know the word “Soprano,” but I didn’t really understand what they all meant. 

So, into my forties, while I wanted to be part of this, I just didn’t have the confidence. At that point, my Neurodiversity was not formally diagnosed. Although it was clear to me, I was still undiagnosed. I’m an introvert, although in certain circumstances, I can be quite extroverted, but I have to feel confident in what’s going on. I wanted to do musical things but could never really be part of it.

Then, after 2018, when I moved regions, one of the things I did do was join a local choir. I had been going to that for nearly a year when COVID hit, and if you remember, singing in choirs was strictly forbidden for an extremely long time. The choir had to stop. I was just beginning to gain a little bit confidence. I had met some nice people, but I was in a choir that sang a cappella without backing tracks.

Then, in that first year, just before COVID hit, I had quite a bad chest infection. When I returned from being unwell, I could no longer sing as high as before. I could never sing high, but I realised I couldn’t even sing alto anymore. So, I started singing tenor, and I probably had a month of that when the lockdowns hit. That was basically the end of my choir career. I hadn’t sung in any kind of concert. 

This year, I moved to again, but this time back to my hometown of Bath. A few months ago, I joined a choir. I’ve been able to reconnect more deeply with several of my school friends that I went to school with 40 or so years ago. One of my friends, who I’ve known since I was 11, said she couldn’t do something on a Friday because she was going to choir. I knew she was musical. I remember her singing and being in the orchestra at school. She still plays in an orchestra. So, a couple of months ago, I thought, “I’m going to go for it.” I went along, and that’s why I joined this choir…

It’s a relatively new choir. It’s been billed as a community choir, so there are no auditions. Bath has a very high-brow musical pedigree, with some amazing, prestigious choirs, orchestras, and ensembles. But this is a thing for local people in a particular area and is supposed to be fun. This time, instead of being a cappella, it’s accompanied by the musical director on keyboards. This music is much more suited for me because I need to hear the tune to know what I have to sing. I may be singing in harmony, but if I can hear the melody, I can pitch myself to that. 

So, I started going along and found myself in the middle of this maelstrom of confusion in the run-up to the big Christmas concert. I joined at the wrong time because it was at the point where most people knew the songs. I didn’t, and I felt very nervous. The first few times, I walked into the thick of it and had no idea what was happening. I had no idea what words I was supposed to be singing, when, or how I was supposed to sing. I just didn’t understand what was going on at all. I found it very confusing not knowing the songs’ running order, with lots of sheets of paper, and I needed help to work out what I was supposed to be doing. The choirmaster would say, “Right, we’ll move on to xyz,” and he might refer to it in a bit of a way which wasn’t the title on the top of the piece of paper. I found that really difficult.

Then, after week three, the choirmaster asked me, “Are you okay, Judy? Have you got the right things? What are you missing?” I did something that, for me, was really brave. I took a huge deep breath and said, “Simon, I am autistic, and I do not cope if I do not know what’s going on, and I do not know what is going on, so I am not coping.” That was extremely brave and very out of character for me to do. To actually “Out myself” in front of people, to let that mask drop, to actually show my vulnerability, and to actually express what my needs were was a big deal. He was amazing, really nice. He really understood, and we had an amazing long chat. It was a massive turning point since he understood where I was coming from and why I was struggling.

While I work in the field of Neurodiversity, it is fine for me to talk about my Neurodiversity on LinkedIn and other social media platforms. To actually admit to somebody what my problem is, in a position where I felt quite vulnerable, quite unsure, very unsure of myself, to actually be able, for once in my life, to be open enough to say, “This is me. These are my difficulties,” was a really big deal for me. He was so lovely about it, and I’m so glad I had the courage to take that deep breath and think, “Now or never. I either actually tell him what the issue is, or I just have to walk away and not do this anymore.” I told him, and it turns out he totally understood and was so welcoming and kind. Sometimes, you never know how people will react if you can be honest about your feelings, whether you’re admitting to somebody that you’re autistic like I was or just something that you’re feeling very anxious about. It was a groundbreaking moment a month ago when I said these things, and it’s made such a difference.

As well as that turning point, a week later, something happened in one of the rehearsals. He threw it out, saying, “I’m going to need a poster to put up in all the villages so everyone knows about it.” He turned to one of the ladies who does the Facebook page and said, “I’m going to put something on the Facebook page.” As a flyaway comment, he said, “Oh, I’m no good at doing posters.” I just said, “I can do that. I’m good at that. I can do that for you.” He turned to me, surprised that I was volunteering while shrinking away from stepping out into the performance mode. He said, “Oh, are you sure?” And I went away and made the poster. Then he asked if I could put it on the main choir WhatsApp group, to which I readily agreed. Not only did I get praise from him about it being amazing and how much I’d helped by doing it, but the other choir members said, “That looks great. I’m going to post that on my own Facebook page.” People were spreading the word.

I suddenly found that I had a niche within the choir, as being able to do such tasks was highly appreciated. Then I asked, “Do you need a programme making too?” He said, “Yes, please!” so I made one. Everybody was really pleased with it. Then, the other thing was, there was some mention about it being really nice to get some publicity shots that we can use in the future, and maybe some clips of what we’ve done. I said, “Oh, I can do that. I can video, and I can do video editing.” Everybody said, “Can you? Oh, wow.” 

Things I didn’t realise were particularly unusual had gone down an absolute storm! I took my camera equipment and set it all up. We can use that, and I’m really pleased with myself. Had I not talked to him, been open, and explained my different qualities, I would have been so stressed that I would have walked away. I wouldn’t have then found myself amid this very welcoming choir with these lovely people who were all really pleased that I’d joined and really pleased with my skills. So, from always generally feeling this “awful feeling of otherness”, not feeling like I belonged, and not feeling like people liked or appreciated me, it’s really done me a huge amount of good.

It’s interesting because, as a very late-diagnosed Dyslexic person, I was very often in a situation where the things that you can do, you don’t realise that other people can’t necessarily do them or do them as well as you can. However, the world measures you by how well you can spell, the neatness of your handwriting, punctuality, and organisation – skills that are not in my skill set. I find spelling really hard and ordering my thoughts really difficult. I have amazing creative thoughts spilling out of my head all the time but being able to get them down on paper when we lived in a pencil-and-paper world, I could never do it. I could never get anything down because there was so much of it, and I couldn’t order it, so it looked like I had no thoughts. I had lots of thoughts; I just couldn’t get pen to paper. So, I understand when my students can’t put pen to paper either. But the things I can do are very useful.

In writing this blog, I realised I’m the kind of person, and perhaps you are too, who, upon realising something needs to be done, simply gets on with it. You work out how to do it, learn how to do it, and then it’s done. I’ve realised, actually, not everybody works in that kind of way. It’s quite eye-opening.

Then, I thought back to 1984, when, as a child, we moved to a new house. Bath is extremely hilly; if you’ve ever been here, our house was very much on the side of a hill. My mother would have been 41, and they had just bought a house on a very steep hill. The garden was “vertical”, I think, is the best way to describe it. My mum, being my mum, and I don’t think she would mind if she were to read this blog, for me to out her as also being Neurodivergent, and there’s no doubt that I got it from her and also my father. We were a house of quirky people. They never realised I was as quirky as I was, because they also were quirky too.

So, my mum was like, “Well, we’ve got this garden, but we can’t really use it because it’s vertical. Well, we’re going to need a load of retaining walls.” There were some springs in the garden because Bath has springs. That’s why the Romans came here. There were problems with drainage and everything. So, my mum went off to the library. She even went to the technical college library, and she took out a load of books on bricklaying and how to build retaining walls. She taught herself bricklaying and built a whole series of retaining walls single-handedly in the garden, making the garden usable.

So, I think back and think, “Yes, that’s my mum being kickass!” I am super proud of her. But it was a part of life – I thought everyone was like that. To me, it was not unusual that if my mum wanted something done, she would figure out how and then do it. I realised, “Yeah, I’ve very much inherited that kind of ‘Okay, how’s this done? How do I need to do this?’” I wanted to learn how to do video editing for my training courses. “Okay, I will sign up and learn how to use Adobe Premiere Pro.” Bigger companies can pay, but we don’t have the budget, so you just learn how to do them. 

I want to put one caveat: if you can get some help on some things, you will reach your destination quicker. So, for example, if you can buy a training course on how to do good copywriting for your social media and go to somebody who runs a quick course on that, you can do that easier, quicker, and better. So if you either buy in somebody’s expertise to actually do it or for them to teach you how to do it, rather than you trying to learn it all on YouTube, you will save yourself time.

“Don’t sell yourself short about what you have learned and taught yourself how to do.” The idea of embracing your unique traits and skills is really important. It’s about what skills you’ve got and the ability to advocate for what you need. Part of the choir story is that I somehow found the courage, rather than just walking away because I was so overwhelmed and quite unhappy. After the third week, I came home virtually in tears, thinking, ‘I just can’t do this. It’s supposed to be uplifting, but it’s making me feel unbelievably anxious, even worse than before…” But that ability that I found, the strength to advocate for myself at that point, really turned things around.

The other thing was that I could advocate for myself and do the programme. Then I realised, ‘I need to have the lyrics all in one place for my ease.’ So, I did what was necessary for me. In effect, I enabled my own access arrangements to deal with it. I could then sing from very clear lyric sheets in a font that worked for me, in a layout that worked for me. Then I shared that, and other people said, “Oh, this is much easier to read now.” This wasn’t a slight on the sheets that the choirmaster had provided week by week. Now, with my ability to do things differently, we can progress as a team. So next time we’re working towards a concert, all he needs to do is send me the lyrics of what we’re doing. In just minutes, I can import them into Canva, organise their layout, set fonts, and ensure they are beautifully uniform and accessible.

Now, there will be other people in the choir who are either diagnosed as Dyslexic or are, due to our ages, not formally diagnosed. There will be people in that situation. Having documentation in a user-friendly way, in a good font – I printed out all my lyrics on my off-white paper, which is the right colour that works for me. Currently, there’s debate over the effectiveness of using coloured papers. Now, personally, I can only speak for myself; I can recognise that certain colours work better for me. Each time, going back to the plain white was the thing that really didn’t work for me. That’s when all my words started to blur and swim about.

So, by advocating for my needs, getting things that will help me but help other people too, and in fact, these approaches help everyone.

So, I found that my skill set, suddenly, from when I walked into the choir, having not previously sung, singing very low, not feeling the same, feeling “different and otherness”, is all turned around. I now feel an integral part of the choir, a valid and bona fide member already. My skills are needed and valued, and I feel really validated. So, you never know how your unique traits and the challenges you face might end up being helpful. 

Consider how skills acquired in one area of your life can unexpectedly become useful in another. For instance, my video editing skills, first learned during lockdown while creating online training courses, have been useful, as were my many hours spent working on Canva over the years.

But another area of my life illustrates how something from your past life may suddenly come back and be relevant. After school, I studied for an engineering degree. I was then working in industry for a company that made multi-million-pound, very clever machines within the semiconductor industry. I worked as a technical author. In hindsight, it seems unusual for someone with Dyslexia to have taken on such a role. At the time, I didn’t even know much about Dyslexia. I think I probably knew the word but didn’t know about it. If you’d said, “Oh, do you find it difficult to spell?” I’d have said, “Oh yes!”

It might seem weird to be a technical author when you can’t spell, but I already used MS Word. Asking me to write creatively is still a challenge for me. But ask me to detail how something works, unpick what happens, or order things – that’s my wheelhouse. I excelled at writing clearly and unambiguously about processes and technical details, writing very clearly what happens or doesn’t happen. I worked in that field for about five or six years. Then I moved region, from Bristol up to Staffordshire, had my son, and I didn’t return to that industry. I wasn’t living in the right place, and I couldn’t. That’s when I retrained to be a primary teacher.

For many years, my skills were good in using the whole Microsoft suite – Word, Publisher, Excel – which was quite useful as a primary teacher. These last few years have seen these skills come full circle. I’m writing guides, guides to teaching in a certain way, writing my training courses, and writing my coaching programmes documentation. I’m now utilising the skills I developed 30 years ago as a technical author. It’s come right back round!

So, you never know when skills acquired in one area of your life can suddenly become useful in another. My career history has been quite varied. Although I trained in Mechanical Engineering, I went into the semiconductor industry, which is not the same area of Engineering. I worked as a technical author, then retrained to be a primary teacher, worked in primary schools, and then eventually worked and lived in a senior boarding school. So, I was also teaching up to GCSE. Eventually, I specialised in tutoring for Neurodiversity, focusing solely on maths rather than general primary education.

My career has been quite a patchwork. But the skills that helped me be good at my job in the mid-90s are suddenly useful again. You never know what you’re doing or have done before might suddenly become useful in another field. There are transferable skills and coming back full circle, like me, back to writing, in effect, instructional manuals. I’ve come back right round to that.

Embracing Your Unique Journey:

Reflecting on your journey so far is a powerful exercise, especially when considering the diverse paths you’ve travelled. Remember, your unconventional path is not a detour but a rich tapestry of experiences that sets you apart. The notion of embracing the entirety of our journey, with its unique experiences and traits, is pivotal for navigating life’s challenges, especially in business.

Recognising Skills and Traits Developed Over Time:

Each phase of your life, each different role you’ve played, has contributed to your unique set of skills and perspectives. Think about these experiences in the context of your business today. Are there skills you learned or traits you developed that could help you now? Perhaps there’s a unique teaching method you devised, a networking strategy you mastered, or even an ability to learn and adapt quickly that you honed. 

Each skill and trait you’ve developed along the way is a valuable asset in your entrepreneurial toolbox, potentially your secret weapon in overcoming business challenges and carving out a unique niche in your market.

Often, we tend to view our career paths and personal attributes in silos, failing to recognise how interconnected and valuable they are. However, when we take a holistic view of our journey, we begin to see the wealth of resources we’ve accumulated over time.

Leveraging Past Experiences in Current Business Challenges:

Your experience in various fields has likely given you a unique approach to problem-solving, seeing solutions where others might not. My technical background, creative skills, communicative skills, and educational expertise provide a unique blend that inspires innovative business strategies and solutions.

Each experience, whether it seems directly relevant or not, contributes to a broader skill set and a more profound understanding of the world. 

Adaptability and Resilience in Business:

Furthermore, your ability to quickly learn and adapt, a trait developed through diverse career transitions, is a significant asset. In the fast-paced world of entrepreneurship, markets and technologies evolve rapidly. Your capacity to pivot and embrace new skills and knowledge is crucial in staying ahead of the curve.

Moreover, your journey through various jobs has likely instilled resilience and a diverse viewpoint, crucial for navigating the uncertainties of running a business. The resilience and adaptability I’ve developed through navigating different career paths and life experiences are invaluable in the ever-changing business landscape.

Challenges often require a blend of hard and soft skills – such as problem-solving, creative thinking, and emotional intelligence – all of which are present in my unique toolbox.

Utilising Your Unique Skill Set for Business Success:

Tapping into this diverse skill set can be immensely beneficial when facing challenges in your business. For instance, my technical background can aid in understanding and implementing new technologies. At the same time, my teaching experience can enhance training and student education. My creative skills, honed through video editing and design, can help craft compelling marketing strategies.

The key to overcoming business challenges often lies in recognising and utilising the full range of your experiences and traits.

Your journey has equipped you with a unique set of tools, and when applied thoughtfully, they can be the very assets that drive your success.

The key, indeed, may have been with you all along, waiting to be acknowledged and leveraged in your entrepreneurial endeavours.